8 thoughts on “The Shame Cave

  1. Oh Em Gee! Even now, even after years of redressing balances, taking responsibilities, apologising til I can’t apologise any more, I am still living in the Shame Cave. I’ll have to read this again and again and I’ll maybe have to haul all the relevant writing I’ve done on this out of the draft folder…finally, to get myself out of it.

    I was just discussing this with my dearest friend the other day, but I cannot fully forgive myself, even if I’ve heard the words “I forgave you years ago” from their own mouths. Shame is a bitch that keeps you down, even when you know you’ve physically done all you can.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It seems kind of universal though. I mean, everyone seems to struggle with guilt over even minor things. And poor moms everywhere … there’s no end to the number of ways you can drop the ball as a parent, and WE ALL TAKE ON SHIT THAT WE NEVER HAD CONTROL OVER TO BEGIN WITH!
      I know I’ve mentioned that I am a student of a Course in Miracles, and one of the biggest reasons is this: One of the miracles of forgiveness (according to the course) is that when you forgive or are forgiven, the effects of the offending act dissipate. Hard to believe, but the course doesn’t ask you to believe anything. The experience itself will prove what’s true or not true. I’ve found it to be true. Over and over again, I seem to have been freed from all the “consequences” of drinking, or of being selfish, irresponsible, etc. And the people I love seem to be freed along with me, especially those I have offended.
      I’ve come to believe that I was never guilty at all except in my own clouded mind.

      Liked by 1 person

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